To the Beat of Our Noisy Hearts

I have a journal called The Happy Book. It's slowly going to contain all of the things that make me the happiest, so guaranteed shopping and shoes are a given on that list. I guess this is an update about me really, a happy update on how I am now. A month or so back life was really rough and it was one of those things where I really didn't think I'd be able to pick myself up from again. Silly me though, I think I forgot who I was. Army brat, parents divorced, graduated in 3 years, seriously is there anything I can't handle? So those first weeks were rough and I totally doubted myself because I had truly lost who I was. I depended on Erik to the point of losing my own identity of who I was without him. There were times I had it back but I lost it just as quick. I realize now just how low my standards got. I fell into a mindless routine that now that I look back on it I tell myself "Thank goodness you're done with that mess!" I settled. I honestly settled for someone I thought could make me happy and I planned on spending the rest of my life with him. Happy ending. Story over. Now I see what a HUGE MISTAKE that would've been! I hate settling and I'm not going to do it ever again. I want a guy who wants to give me the world and who will serve it up for me on a silver platter that he hand forged from the silver that he mined. Get my drift? :) So until I find that guy I will live my life like crazy and make the most of every day. I will enjoy the sunshine, the rain, and the clouds in between. Things have happened to me this past week that one, I can't explain, and two, mean more to me then my entire relationship with Erik did. I had the most perfect summer night and it never would've happened if I was still with him. I was so afraid this summer would be something I wanted to forget but it ended up being the summer I want to remember for the rest of my life.

I traveled....

I got my heart broken...

I changed...

I gave up on love....

But it didn't give up on me...

 So now I take chances...

Cuz I know one day this will be me...

But for now I'm happy going on my own path...

 Cuz I'm sitting pretty and I love the view from here...

This is my summer to remember...